Why one person wants to be at the Starting Over Show this March….
I was in Brighton staying at the Ship on Friday night with some girlfriends for a birthday and I picked up the Sos leaflet about the show on the 15th MARCH.
I have been seperated from my husband for 5 years now after he started an affair and left after a year of indecision as to what to do about it. I have always wanted him to come back – feeling as if he has left a void for me and my 2 children (15 and 11, then 9 and 6). I feel true love for him despite all the hurt he has caused us.
On 4 occasions (almost yearly), having sometimes met other people and not seeming to make myself feel the right way about them, and his relationship with the same woman often not working out as he had planned, we have almost got back together, but each time he has gone back to her as I believe her to be the most powerful out of us two women. I still love him very much, and reading your article ‘a strange gift’ has helped me realise I am not alone feeling that and that I can use that love to help the children in keeping us ‘ healthily and positively apart’.
Now I am not a weak person. I am a freelance food stylist, preparing food for photography and writing recipes for magazines and books. I love my job and all those I work with. I have many friends and I love to help others. I spend alot of time with friends and doing what I can for others makes me feel ‘needed’ and making, what I believe to be the best, for my children also gives me that sense of responsibility and purpose that I seem to desperately need to be at one with myself.
I took the children to Australia last year for the whole of the school summer holidays and I take them every year to the Isle of Wight Festival – putting my own tent up and down!!! (I read your article in eve magazine!) I know I do so much with my life now that I would never have done had I been with my ex still. I run my sons football team and have done for 4 years etc….. but I still have a void. I keep ridiculously busy with so much – but I know its to distract my thoughts from my failed relationship.
I feel happy and I feel motivated but still something is not right and I dont necessarily feel that a man would make that better – which is why I am not actively looking and rarely have done!
Having picked up your leaflet I feel hugely inspired and excited about such a show and I will most definately be there. Meeting others with similar situations could most definately help – which is something I have not done – not in a therapy situation anyway and its something I feel the need to do. Workshops sound a great idea for the show too. I feel so able to help others and do so as much as I can, but helping myself emotionally is not as easy!
Many thanks for taking the time to read this
An inspired SOS ticket holder!!