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Divorce With Lawyers Who Talk To Each Other: The Collaborative Divorce Process

Divorce With Lawyers Who Talk To Each Other: The Collaborative Divorce Process

  According to the Mirror, lawyers estimate that the average cost of a UK divorce is – in real terms – £70,243 and rising – with the average person losing out on £4,686 of their salary, with an added £5,089 on finding alternative accommodation, £8,926 in legal fees and £51,543 in paying off debt and sharing assets.   Of course, if the divorce starts to get ‘out of hand’ – then legal fees can begin to soar. I spoke recently with a mother who has had to borrow...

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Dispute Resolution Survey Results

Dispute Resolution Survey Results

    I put some key questions to a group of international Dispute Resolution practitioners a few months ago – with the majority of respondents being from the UK – and here are the interim results. The size of the survey is not ‘statistically relevant’ (ie. not yet 100 participants) but it does give some thought provoking data and comments (all confidential regarding who has made them!) The participants were nearly 80% Mediators, 68% Collaboratively trained, just over 16%...

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Collaborative Lawyers and High Profile Divorce

Collaborative Lawyers and High Profile Divorce

  I hear a lot of about collaborative lawyers and the good work they do helping couples navigate the complex process of separation and divorce.   Perhaps the collaborative model would be best for Brexit – legal advice to hand, yet ultimately, collaboration and clear communication (rather than game-playing) the order of the day?  And a lot more private too.   Several celebrity couples have gone through a collaborative divorce. Singer and performer Madonna and her former...

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What often get’s missed out with a quickie divorce

What often get’s missed out with a quickie divorce

  A recent question came up in our Secret Facebook Group about what is the best online divorce provider. It’s a good question to ask, because the feedback I have had from many people who have used them, is that the quality of the service can vary enormously. But I notice the real problem they have, is that their expectations about what a divorce actually involves, are often way out of kilter. The person asking the question in this case seemed very much in control of the process and was...

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Theta Healing Radio Interview with Debbie Talalay

Theta Healing Radio Interview with Debbie Talalay

  In this Brooklands Radio Surrey interview with Theta Healer Debbie Talalay, Debbie explains how Theta Healing is a quick and powerful way to heal the mind of subconscious blocks – and also physical problems.     She relates an incredible story about a Theta Healing client who reported that her Psoriasis disappeared overnight, and how she has helped people with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.     “Debbie Talalay – wow, if you haven’t been to see...

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Even Swans Get Divorced

Even Swans Get Divorced

Petra isn’t known for her philandering. A number of male swans attempted to make her acquaintance in the two years preceding December 2007 – but Petra rejected them all, for she was in love with a plastic swan-shaped pedal boat. The romantic escapades of the black swan hit headlines around the world when she began following a white pedal boat around on the lake where she lived. When winter arrived, she refused to be separated from the boat when workers removed it from the lake for the winter....

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Infidelity: Julia Keys wants us to spy on each other

Infidelity: Julia Keys wants us to spy on each other

The wife of former Sky Sports presenter Richards Keys has claimed she spotted ‘telltale’ signs that he may be seducing another woman – as she wrote a book on infidelity.  A trained counsellor, she has now written a book called The Manscript, which helps readers to identify when their partner is cheating on them. I hope that as a trained counsellor, Julia Keys will offer more in her book than how to increase the level of paranoia and fear in every couple who reads the book, where one of...

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Networking In Business and its Importance

Networking In Business and its Importance

  The gathering of the clan (well, some of them) at the Chesterfield Networking Event in Mayfair – but is person-to-person business networking still worthwhile in the social media age?     Networking In Business and its Importance   We are constantly bombarded with advertisements, emails, status updates, special offers.  But do you ever feel that someone is making an actual effort to get to know you properly? Or do you feel just like you have lots of junk and...

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Securing Your Financial Future After Divorce

Securing Your Financial Future After Divorce

  In his interview with Suzy Miller of the Alternative Divorce Guide, Charlie Reading, of Chartered Financial Planning firm Efficient Portfolio, talks about securing your financial future after divorce, and how to prepare for and deal with the financial impact of divorce.   The financial impact of divorce can be very demanding, especially as it comes at a time when the emotional stress is already high. Taking the time to plan financially helps ensure that your divorce runs as...

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Child First Campaign to prevent abusive ex-partners cross examining their victims in court

Child First Campaign to prevent abusive ex-partners cross examining their victims in court

  Fantastic news – and proof that sanity does eventually (begin to) prevail in the world of Divorce and Families:  As a result of the Child First Campaign bringing the issue of survivors of domestic abuse being cross examined by their abusers in the family courts and the subsequent Guardian investigation into the issue, the Government have announced an emergency review to find the quickest way to ban abusive ex-partners from cross examining their victims. Women’s Aid say...

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Brynne Edelsten’s ‘brutal’ divorce a lifestyle choice over divorce mediation?

Brynne Edelsten’s ‘brutal’ divorce a lifestyle choice over divorce mediation?

  US-Born Brynne Edelsten described her divorce as “nasty and brutal”, leading her to declare she “would never be friends” with the former Sydney Swans owner as she battled to finalise her financial settlement.  But conflict creates stress – both financial and emotional – which is why divorce mediation could have made Brynne’s experience of divorce very different..     Samantha Jago, Divorce Mediator and Solicitor at RHW Solicitors, believes that the...

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Brexit Divorce goes on and on – just like a real divorce! by Victoria Sharman

Brexit Divorce goes on and on – just like a real divorce! by Victoria Sharman

In family life, separation and divorce is traumatic and distressing. It has a negative impact on the overall health and wellbeing of those involved. Although the EU is not a ‘family’ unit, the UK’s vote to exit reflects and parallels the negative fall-out and effects of high-conflict ‘family’ separations on the individuals involved. As a divorce counsellor, Brexit fuelled my therapeutic curiosity. Personally, it brought up issues of loss of relationships and familiar connections. I became...

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When Your Confidence and Until Death Do Us Part are Dancing to a Different Beat – by Dee Burrowes

When Your Confidence and Until Death Do Us Part are Dancing to a Different Beat – by Dee Burrowes

  There’s something magical about family holidays like Christmas and Easter that encourage people to bring joy to others. It’s one of my absolute favourite times of the year where my family and extended family traditionally come together to give thanks. But has the reality of Christmas or Easter without the ‘perfect family’ hit home for you this year – or for someone you know and love?  Is there a husband and wife who are dancing to different tunes – out of...

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A Merry Christmas to the Alternative Divorce Team 2016

A Merry Christmas to the Alternative Divorce Team 2016

With heartfelt thanks I would like to say how honoured I am to be supporting such an elite group of experts in their fields, and to say how amazing it is to be able to share this mission to change the lives of families for the better. I am looking forward to 2017 and making some big breakthroughs, and to sharing that success with all of you who have made it possible by being part of Alternative Divorce. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from...

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How Divorce Can Have an Effect on Health – Nigel Rowland Interview by Suzy Miller

How Divorce Can Have an Effect on Health – Nigel Rowland Interview by Suzy Miller

  Suzy Miller of the Alternative Divorce Guide interviewed Nigel Rowland, a financial services expert about the effect divorce can have on your health – and how to protect yourself from the possible financial fallout during and after this difficult time.   Divorce Has Lasting Impact on Health.   It is no surprise to anyone who has experienced it themselves, to discover that Divorce can have lasting repercussions on health: *studies show that even for those who remarry, the...

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How to create a business plan for your Life, and who is qualified to help you.

How to create a business plan for your Life, and who is qualified to help you.

  Sam Whybrow believes we all need a ‘business plan’ for our own lives, so that our finances will empower us to live the lives we dream of – not hold us back, hiding our true potential.  But to create such a ‘business plan’ for your life, you need specialist financial guidance to be proactive not reactive with your finances – and Sam explains how to access that support.   What is the service that you provide? In effect, I act a as Finance Director for my clients,...

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Wallowing in Misery, or Wading Through to the Other Side? By Vivienne Smith

Wallowing in Misery, or Wading Through to the Other Side?  By Vivienne Smith

  There are so many ways to cope with the loss of a relationship, but some of them will just leave you feeling worse.   In this interview with Transformation Coach and author of “The Single Mum’s Survival Guide“, Vivienne Smith shares a few examples or how we deal with relationship breakdown, and what better choices we can make:     Denial   You assure everyone you are fine but you realise that you are drinking too much, eating too much or laughing...

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Protecting your privacy after your divorce from social media harassment: Karen Bashford

Protecting your privacy after your divorce from social media harassment: Karen Bashford

Is your Ex following you through social media and the internet? Social media is a wonderful tool for staying in contact, finding clients and suppliers, and on a social level, sharing informative and fun videos. But there is also a dark side to social media – one that as a divorcee you need to be aware of. I discovered how vulnerable I was to my horror, when my ex of 22 years used social media and my website to harass me. It is not pleasant to receive an email or comments on a blog from...

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Is divorce the right choice? by Karen Bashford

Is divorce the right choice? by Karen Bashford

  The Four Stages of Divorce   There are 4 stages to a divorce – the initial decision of should I or shouldn’t I?  Telling your partner… Sorting out the practicalities of a divorce… And finally the divorce itself.   Each stage has an impact on you both emotionally – and financially.  All four stages can be supported by a qualified coach to make each stage less challenging and to ensure that you make the right decisions.   First stage of divorce...

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Divorce and Faith

Divorce and Faith

  Life Coach Zina Arinze talks about the conflicts between Faith and Divorce, if your faith says that divorce is ‘wrong’.  How do you deal with that?     “I believe most Christians agree that marriage is supposed to be forever. But when you find yourself separated, divorced or going through the process, how do you deal with the aftermath?”     A Divorced Christian Single Mum, Zina Arinze, has struggled with this dilemma, and learned so much...

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Fixed-Price Mediations – will they become the norm?

Fixed-Price Mediations – will they become the norm?

  “A Serious Lack of Transparency”   This was the conclusion of recent research into the cost of legal services.  Perhaps one of the best ways to help clients manage their finances in the divorce arena, is to offer more fixed-price services.  This has been seen as difficult in the divorce arena, where costs can easily spiral, but Fixed-Fee Mediations are now beginning to be offered by client-focused law firms.   Family Mediator Samantha Jago of RHW Solicitors in...

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Can Arbitration ‘rescue’ a mediation going off the rails?

Can Arbitration ‘rescue’ a mediation going off the rails?

  Rather than throwing your hands up in despair when a series of mediations look ready to collapse, and rail against the inability of the couple to decide on one specific area that they just ‘got stuck on’ – then why not give that couple the opportunity to let an Arbitrator decide for them? Not only do they stay out of court, but they also could continue the mediation process after that sticky patch was dealt with.  Doesn’t that not seem a sensible option? But...

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It’s not just about talking to lawyers when divorcing……

It’s not just about talking to lawyers when divorcing……

  You are not alone:   Did you know that even though swans usually mate for life, sometimes they still ‘divorce’? Divorce & family breakup is an emotional & psychological journey, more than a legal & financial one.   What you feel will directly effect how you act: your pain, anger, fear or sense of hopelessness is all quite natural.       How do I keep myself sane through all this?   I think we all go a little crazy during big life changes...

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Weapons of War – children and divorce

Weapons of War – children and divorce

  Will divorce really harm my children?   No-one wants their kids to be used as weapons in an adversarial divorce – yet so many families fall into that trap. Your children can grow up as happy as everyone else’s kids – despite the divorce.  But let’s be aware of the consequences if we get it wrong…..   Listen to Catherine’s story…..       Want to reduce the toxic effects of divorce on your kids?   Use the Alternative Divorce Guide...

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The right kind of lawyers

The right kind of lawyers

  A taste of what choices are available to you when dealing with a ‘co-parent’   I find the easiest way to get a good over view of the options open to me, is to watch a short video. So here are some of the experts you will find in CoParenting in a Box talking about ways to deal with divorce, and also post-divorce conflicts over money and child access, and how to break up intelligently when you live with someone and are not legally married. Yep, staying ‘out of...

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Practical tips when divorcing by a life organiser

Practical tips when divorcing by a life organiser

When Getting Divorced Keep A Record Of All Your Possessions   If you’re looking for decluttering and help in the home – contact Suzy Miller Email: suzy@startingovershow.com         Divorce is often described as a bereavement. Accepting change can be difficult, coming to terms with the loss of a relationship, the home and sentimental possessions can soon fuel our emotions, resulting in aggression, bullying and controlling behaviour. If you want to know more...

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Stressed dads – fatherhood and divorce

Stressed dads – fatherhood and divorce

  Susan Cowe Miller reassures new dads that there is a simple way to deal with the inevitable stress of fatherhood using Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping).   This technique would be particularly useful for dads who don’t live with their children, and where the contact is squashed into a limited amount of time – which can make the parenting experience even more stressful.     Are you a father finding parenthood difficult?   Are you new to...

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Divorce Coaching is not the same as Counselling

Divorce Coaching is not the same as Counselling

  Zina Arinze of Believe and Live Again shares her views on how divorce coaching can differ from traditional counselling: “One of the things that people need to understand is that there is a difference between being a coach, being a mentor, and being a therapist or a councillor.  Now a councillor will help you to uncover what’s happened in the past.  You might have some hidden issues from your childhood. that have really formed you, and developed you, and made you who you are...

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3 Myths that Scare Divorcing Mums

3 Myths that Scare Divorcing Mums

I am a child psychologist Una Archer and I help divorcing mums to do whatever they need to do so that their children feel just as loved, secure and comfortable in their own skin as before the divorce and sometimes even more so. Helping children feel safe is the most direct way of preventing and resolving any issues that the divorce can cause for them. Having had the privilege to witness the journey of a fair few mums I noticed that there are some ideas that seem to be floating in our culture...

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Overcoming Rejection Post Divorce

Overcoming Rejection Post Divorce

Leading London-based Theta healer Debbie Talalay of Deborah Talalay Healing, empowers her clients who have been held back by a fear of rejection, through her affordable videos and energy-based healing.  For those who have been through a divorce or separation, that sense of rejection can be very difficult to shift without the use of Debbie’s healing techniques. “Fear of rejection – this plagues most of us at some time or other in our lives, and yet there is such a simple way...

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